Well, I sure Blacked Out!

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you - here and now - the very reason abortion should be legalised. I give you... 'Black Out Band'.

I don't know exactly where to begin with this gargantuan slice of colossal failure, so - presuming you've had a very brief look at the website - I'll go Wikipedia style. Black Out Band is a small 'rock band' consisting of three 11-year old munchkins: Matthew, Tug, and lastly - I kid you not - Hunter. These unfortunately un-molested pre-teens are the exhibitors of some of the most skin-crawling homicide-inducing piles of absolute shit the music industry has ever been tainted with, and that's a real achievment considering Crazy Frog. Now, I ask you, take a moment if you haven't already. Take a moment, and watch the video on the website linked above. Just.. go on. Go watch it, and then read on when you're finished.

...

I apologise for putting you through that. Yes, I understand, I would have rather eaten my own sick than listen to that ear-splitting display of utter talentless tripe aswell. But now, you understand my pain. Judging by the way these kids "don't wanna go to school, just wanna be a fool" they've accomplished it magnificently, they're uneducated fools on an unmeasurable scale. I could go on listing all the faults here...

... so I will. I don't really understand how this abomination came to be in the first place, but discovering that the parents have actually written some of the lyrics, it's pretty obvious that these are just brainless rich kids with parents who can afford to do all this shit for them because "it's fun for the kids". You can tell that the parents control everything here just by reading some of the sentences. Let me just present a few to you.

"The concept of the song was born when the band's music coach always found the three playing video games when not practicing music."
So that's... all the time, basically.

"Hunter has been playing guitar for four years, with an enigmatic vocal presence that is slightly reminiscent of Neil Young."
This here, is the equivalent of when your parents stuck that fucking awful drawing you did on the fridge when you were five. This is that, but on a much larger scale. And I mean much larger. I mean, come on. His voice is like Stephen Hawking's computer on helium.

"Tug and Matthew are both excellent in the rhythm section, as the bass thumps and percussion stomps often set the tone for the song."
This is just a prime example of the writer's boundless naivety and complete lack of knowledge on what they're talking about. This is just laughably pretentious. 'The bass and percussion set the tone for the song'? Holy shit, these guys must be really good if the bass and percussion does something as incredible as that! I mean holy shit!

God, I really hope these noisy faggots get on the next X Factor auditions. The response provoked by their refusal into the further stages could just be the best moment of television ever.